In celebration of hitting the 30 week milestone I thought it would be a good time for a preggo post! Since this is my first one, I'm going to recap on the beginning of this journey. Then each week I'll write about another part of the story (this is my way of making up for not blogging all the way through!).
It definitely took us a while to feel our version of "ready" before trying for this little guy (sorry, Mom! ;) ). As we all know, children change everything in life - your priorities, your finances, your sleep schedule, and how you manage "free" time. It was daunting to think that we couldn't just do stuff when we wanted to; we wouldn't be able to binge on video games or movie marathons for hours, leave the house on a whim, and at every turn we would have to consider someone else's needs before ours ("What do you mean you can't take a 4 week old to Ouija: Origin of Evil?!") . Eventually there would be one more hangry person not knowing what they want for dinner, and that's a terrifying thought in itself. We wanted to cherish our child-free time until we could cherish no more. So we did. Then one day we woke up, decided we had cherished enough and it was time to take the plunge!
I won't bore you with the next part.
As it happened I was going through the dreaded/exciting/anxiety producing Two Week Wait right around Christmas 2015. Honestly, (and believe me, I know how lucky I am to say this) this has been one of the worst parts of pregnancy. I had gone through it before and knew from experience that there was absolutely nothing you could do to just know if you conceived or not. You have to wait. Two weeks seems like a very long time when you are waiting. You can get every symptom in the book that signifies a positive test is on the horizon and still get an ever-enjoyable visit from Aunt Flow. This happened to me more than once, so by last December I was trying really hard not to read too much into every ache and pain in my body as a possible symptom ("my thumb hurts... Weird...! Is that a sign of pregnancy?! I must Google RIGHT NOW!!"). It wasn't hard this time because I wasn't having any aches or pains, so I thought for sure this wasn't the month. Luckily the commotion of getting ready for Christmas kept me sane (and saved many a flower from having their petals plucked).
We were having Christmas at the coast, and as Troy and I were driving I realized that my two week wait was almost over - I still wasn't having any aches or pain. None. Not even the ones that are a calling card from Aunt Flow. Now that really was weird, but woefully, I didn't have cell reception to ask Google if that was a sign. Troy was tired of me saying, "That's gotta mean something, right? Right?! What's it MEAN?!" Over and over again, so he rightfully told me to close my trap and just keep waiting. We did bring a pregnancy test, just in case, so I could take that in the morning. Christmas morning. Imagine how awesome and perfectly timed THAT would be!!
So 5 am Christmas morning when I had to pee I took my test with me and waited breathlessly for 2 minutes (I guess I must have taken at least one breath, but I don't remember it) trying to see 2 blue lines. Nope. Only one. Negative. Aunt Flow just missed her plane and was running late (holiday traffic, I'm sure). I was disappointed, but it was still Christmas and now I didn't have to pretend to not want to use the hot tub or drink mimosas; I went ahead and indulged in those luxuries for the next 2 days. Still, a nagging feeling remained.
On Monday morning Troy headed off to work, while I stayed home enjoying the last day of my vacation. It was only a couple of days since my last test, and Troy had cautioned me about over analyzing the situation (he knows me well), but I couldn't ignore that persistent feeling in my gut. I just had to double check, and hey, who would have to know? It was just me and the cats and dogs.
Half an hour, and one trip to the store later I was now going through the Two Minute Wait again. I had brought my test to the couch so I could play Fallout 4 and pretend everything was cool and that my expectations were low. I nonchalantly told my cats that I was just going to pause real quick and check the test (I pulled this charade about 100 times the first minute). And then just like that... there it was:
I knew it! I was at once elated and bewildered. I had dreamed and hoped for this moment, and now it was real. There was a baby. No matter what happened or how, my life had changed course. I paced around with hundreds of feelings going through my head. Then I grabbed my purse and headed out the door because now I had a husband to tell!
I was too awestruck to do a very creative reveal, and I didn't want to delay the news much past Troy getting home, so I stayed simple with my surprise. I settled on a cute baby onesie and a handwritten note. Then I had to wait AGAIN for 6 o'clock when he would hopefully roll in on time from work.
Finally he arrives:
Him: "Hi Sweets!" [Gives me a kiss while I fold laundry and act way natural] "Why are you smiling like that?"
Me: "I'm just happy you are home." [tries to dial it down] "Oh, I have something for you." [I'm so casual, there is no way he knows what I'm up to]
Him immediately: "Are you pregnant?!"
Me: ... [hands over bag]
He ALWAYS guesses his gifts before he opens them!
It wasn't quite the BIG SURPRISE moment I was going for, but he was stoked...and nervous. Just like me. We spent the rest of the evening trying to figure out what to do next, discussing how long to wait before telling our family (we decided to wait until the first ultrasound 8 weeks away which seemed like FOREVER), and in general trying to wrap our heads around all the changes that were going to come.
Despite having to ring in the New Year completely sober, it was an excellent start to what has been an exhilarating 7 1/2 months!
So, Stranger, have you played the Waiting Game recently (whether it's pregnancy related or not)? Tell me about it!